Churchill High - Seriously?

I heard something yesterday that really ticked me off.

This week we learned of a pair of teachers from Winnipeg (Manitoba, Canada) who engaged in rather raunchy and completely inappropriate dance as a part of a competition being held for the school's Spirit Week.  These teacher's are from Churchill High School.  The dance is being described as one "in which the man appeared to rub against the woman and simulate oral sex — lasted about a minute."  One youth simply said it "looked like sex in the gym."

So this in itself is bad enough.  But this is what riled me; one radio commentator says, "these teacher's should learn in university that this is not acceptable."

Seriously?  They didn't know?  Come on! 

What would cross anyone's mind for even a second that maybe, just maybe, somehow this act would be seen as acceptable?  Have we denigrated our own society this much that we don't have the where with all to know right from wrong?

Student Saigha Vincent recorded the dance on her phone and posted the one minute clip on Youtube.  Her father, Tim Galay, said, "It’s common. There’s dancing stuff going on all the time, on dancing shows and that. I don’t think it’s that big a deal.”  

Come on! I am a dad and this IS a problem!  I don't know how anyone can justify the actions of the teachers.  There is no conceivable way that a student attending a school spirit event at their high school should ever be exposed to such live sexually suggestive dancing by teachers who we trust our children to be with for, get ready for it...education.  Try as they might, this is not, was not and can not be educationally appropriate.

These teachers were wrong.  Their judgement must be questioned.  Parent's must be questioned as well, those who do not see such acts as concerning.  Really?  Put your son or daughter in the role of those teachers and tell me you wouldn't have a problem with their soft porn in the school gym.

Well, there it is.  I had to put it out there.  We are losing any sense of self respect, morality and decency if we fail to see these actions as a problem.

Everyone has a story.  I am sure this one isn't done yet.

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Transient Joys

Late last summer I rode into a local parking lot that is a common ground for motorbikes, and their riders, stopping to take a break.  On this day, there was only one other person there with a bike, but I stopped and we talked.  Bikers will almost invariably take the time to talk with other bikers.

On this particular day, this gentleman, who appeared to have taken the scorn of many years, seemed to be a jovial mood.  I casually asked how he was doing to which he replied “Could be better.”  Further talk revealed that he had cancer.  Well, that’s an easy conversation to engage in, but I figured hey let’s give it a try.

This man went on to explain that he was going to live the last days of his life “drinking, chasing women and getting high smoking pot!”  I said “Wow!  Are you happy?”  The mood changed and he said hesitantly, “No.”

How often do we put on the front for the sake of others?  If I didn’t want to know how you were doing I wouldn’t ask.  Sure I know it’s a habit to ask people, “How are you?” or, “How you doing?”  But if we take the time to actively listen to someone, we would inevitably learn something new.

So here’s a guy, riding his Harley-Davidson, drinking coffee with me, tired and worn out from the ravages of life and cancer, who tries to come across as a party animal who is just looking for a good time, yet, is admittedly unhappy.  

That is sad.

All the years this man has lived, looking for purpose and reason to his life, through parties, exploits, drugs, alcohol and God only knows what else, yet here he stands alone in a parking lot talking to me, a complete stranger, admitting he isn’t happy.

We talked about hope, and the only true source of hope, but he wasn’t ready to hear it.  I sincerely hope that before his time comes up, he takes the time to listen to someone and hear that he has an alternative to his sorrowful life.  An opportunity to experience lasting joy and peace, not the transient nature of the joys of the world.

Everyone has a story.  What’s yours? 

rowleywriter@gmail.com

What Would Jesus Ride?

The Christian Motorcycle Association has a series of small cards on their display at a local bike show that read, “Jesus would ride a Harley”.  A member of an outlaw club said to me this weekend as we were admiring the skill and rare creativity it took to design this particular trike, “I bet they won’t have bikes like this in Heaven”.  I kindly advised that Heaven will have only the best bikes (if there are any at all, and I personally expect them to be there) so I would expect to see it there.

I went online to look up the question of ride choices of God and Jesus.  I am not the first to ponder such questions.  Of course, the majority say He would ride a Harley-Davidson, but there are some claiming he would ride older classic bikes, others saying he would ride something very unassuming and would not stand out in a crowd.  I read one person saying that if Jesus were to ride in India His choice would be a “Cow-asaki.”

The two best answers that I came across were somewhat an overlap of the ideas that others expressed; a Harley-Davidson ‘Road King’ and any make of ‘Triumph’.  Road King, because nothing suits the King of Kings better than a bike named King, and a Triumph as God will be Triumphant.

But really, why do we care?  Or maybe we don’t really care.  We are just filling time talking about pointless and meaningless topics because that’s what we do in our attempts to appear, at least somewhat, intelligent.

There are far more important issues at hand.  Issues facing humanity that far exceed the ramblings of senseless arguments of spiritual bike choices.  Struggles such as child prostitution, human trafficking, starvation, lack of medical treatments, declining morality amongst the new generations, secular humanism and natural disasters.  If we would spend time on such legitimate concerns, possibly we could see that there are aspects of life that we can make a difference in.  

We have all heard, “For little more than the cost of a cup of coffee a day...”  I assure you, though, money isn’t the answer.  It is people with concern.  People with a foundation of morality.  Families who are based on biblical truths, not extremism.  Care and concern is vanishing, especially if the soundtrack of the television fund raiser isn’t playing in the background stirring emotions in the soul that just yesterday had rejected a door to door fund raiser for missing children.  Suddenly we care.

Suddenly.  If it is sudden, is it real?  Charities rely on these sorts of donations.  I am not suggesting that we don’t give or that we don’t reach out and help.  I AM saying, give and help for the right reasons.  Don’t be a hero.  Be a caring and compassionate person who reaches out with sincerity and truth, with understanding and knowledge, and with wisdom and guidance.  These things are only going to develop through education and reflection.  Learn TRUTH and contrast ideas against the truth to determine if is something you should be involved in.

Let’s get back to morality.  Let’s go to a foundation of truth that all things are built upon.

Maybe as time passes, I will have the opportunity to speak with the outlaw biker again.  Maybe we can talk more and continue our banter back and forth between the dark side and the light side.  It is a testament in itself that we can stand beside each other in our colours, almost as though the ends of a spectrum standing side by side.  I wonder what has occurred in his life that caused him to turn to the outlaw clubs?  What is the draw?  What is it that he has accepted as truth?  When that days comes that we talk again, I would love to sit with him and hear his story.  Because everyone has a story.

By the way, Jesus would ride a custom built ride.

Iglesia Espanol

My family and I went to church with friends of ours this morning.  It’s a charming and friendly small church of a different denomination than we are, but coming together is still a precious experience.  We learned that in the evenings the church holds a Spanish service.  This began when Pastor Doug felt a need to provide a place for migrant workers to come and worship when they were in the area for summer work.  Tonight would be a special night.  Everyone was invited to tonight's service and share a meal afterwards.

I had to go back!  After being in Cuba earlier in 2009 I came to appreciate the Spanish language, the hospitality of the people and, of course, good food.  Granted, the Spanish speaking congregates at tonight’s service are not from Cuba, the latin culture was evident in the warmness of our hosts.

My wife and I sat in the service and I was awash with fond memories of sitting and celebrating in the Spanish churches I have previously visited.  I began to miss my friends; Joshua, Soto and Xiomara, as well as many many others.  One young girl I met in Cuba had a smile that radiated pure joy.  She was just twelve years old and actually preached a sermon on our first night.  She spoke barely more English other than “My name is Coosie.  What is your name?”  

It was both mine and my son’s first trip to Cuba.  He was just 11 at the time and took everything in stride.  From immigration searches to repeated immigration questioning, from police stopping our vehicle...repeatedly... to the chickens running over our feet during dinner in out palm leaf dining room, from the guy trying to steal out camera equipment to playing soccer and football with children who have never thrown a foot ball before.  The fresh tropical fruit, cutting coconuts from the tree with a machete, trying new foods and giving our new friends peanut butter for the first time.

If you haven’t embraced cross cultural experiences, you are missing out on what the world has to offer.  You will only get out of an experience what you put into it.  Get out of your comfort zone, visit new places, talk to new people and make new friends because everyone has a story.

You don't know what you've got 'til it's gone...

For the past couple of weeks I have bid farewell to my Macbook as I awaited the arrival of a new power cord.  Instead of my trusting friend, I had to resort to using my wife's (cough) Acer (cough) and hack my way way through (choke) Windows Vista (gag).

If you are an avid Mac user, you understand my pain.  Today I received my new cord and I was reunited with my laptop.

It's so good to have you back my friend.  I missed you.

Manners and Common Courtesy

Pet peeves are often written about in blogs, so this isn’t anything new. I have to ask though, what happened to manners and common courtesy?


My wife and I were leaving the pet store after looking at Bearded Dragons last night; not for us, but our daughter is buying one in a couple of weeks. As we leave the store to venture into the cold, I hold the door open for an older man who was coming into the store. Nothing. Not a word was said aside my comments made under my breath.

I just don’t understand. I didn’t have to hold his door. As a matter of fact, it slows me down but a good two seconds as I try to get in my van and out of the cold. He should be thanking me. But more so, he should want to thank me; or anyone else who does the courtesy regardless of the weather. Holding a door isn’t a big deal, but I know from being a kid once, as we all were, you said ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ to people. Maybe this guy wasn’t ever a child. Maybe this guy didn’t have the best upbringing or parents to show him manners and common courtesy.

On a side note, as I sit in my living room and write this, two children just walked across my yard on their way to school. Why? Who told them it was okay to walk across my yard? Maybe I’m getting crotchety in my age…I’ll be 37 this year.

Anyways. The truth is, if this was an isolated experience, I probably would not have minded so much. He must have had a reason for not acknowledging my existence on earth. He must have a story. We all do. It doesn’t excuse poor manner though.

So what about cashiers and fast food? Am I the only one who has noticed the perceived inconvenience I cause them by requiring their services? Sometimes, after the order is processed I wouldn’t even know the total cost if there weren’t a digital display to show me. I guess there are a lot of mute employees in our city. They have forgotten this ever vanishing phrase, “Hi.” So simple, yet lost on a new generation? I hope not.

Maybe they didn’t learn the needed social skills to function in a civil society. Common sense isn’t that common I know.

I haven’t travelled too much of the world, but I have been across Canada, to Russia, to Cuba and through many of the eastern states. Most people know how to be polite, especially southerners and maritimers. Most people take a five second break from their life to note your existence and will have a conversation with you. In fact, they might even start one! You had better be ready!

This culture of incompetence, this society of anti social personalities seems to be more prevalent in cities. Especially in Ontario. Definitely in my city. If we took the time to get to know people, including our neighbours, I would venture a bet that we would be a happier society and we wouldn’t need to feel a desire to shelter ourselves from others. It’s just rude. Remember the golden rule? Treat others as you would want to be treated? If that is still the case, we are in for a load of trouble.

But everyone has a story.

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Multiple Lives

In Ontario, Wing commander Col. Russell Williams was arrested Sunday and was charged with first degree murder in the death of Jessica Lloyd, 27. This man was described as “a shining star” in the military. Since his arrest, “Williams faces charges of first-degree murder in the deaths of the two women and the sexual assaults of two others. Ontario Provincial Police say several connecting factors ultimately led them to Williams, but are refusing to divulge any specifics, only citing geography as one of the common elements.” (Toronto Star)

So what happened?

Did this man just face a psychotic break resulting from trauma faced in brutalities of battle? Not likely say some, since he didn’t serve any great amount of time overseas, but rather throughout Canada at various bases.

Was it simply an accident? Well, not likely. Maybe, just maybe if it was once, but twice plus other assaults…I am going to go with NO!

So what was it? A radio host out of London, Ontario, was hosting a morning talk show and suggested that people may have two, three or more lives that they live. At first it sounded a bit off the wall.

The comment, though, lead me to consider my own life and those of people I know. Do I live a double life, or a triple life? On Monday to Friday I am dressed in business casual, going about my routines of seeing clients throughout the day and evening. On weekends and some evenings, especially in the warmer months, I am in biker leathers. On Sunday’s I am in church. I also have a family; children with whom I spend time with on ‘date’ nights, a wife who is with me at my best, and my worst. I enjoy the quiet time to read a book, and the thunder of new pipes on my bike.

So I suppose then that I do have ‘multiple lives’. I suppose we all do. But there must be a common thread that transcends all of our lives. The most basic common factor in all of my lives, is a core being with basic core needs and values. The need for love, safety, shelter and food. The need for attention, meaning and self worth. These needs, I suppose, are all met through my various lives, but at the end of the day, my integrity, my identity, remains intact. I cannot so much as entertain the thought of engaging in activities that would contravene my values – you give power to what you pay attention to, you become your thoughts, you reflect your surroundings.

Something has gone terribly wrong for Col. Russell Williams. What must his common thread be that transcends all of his lives? Time will tell as the case is further explored.

In the mean time, what is your common thread? Be careful. No one began their life wanting to hurt, harm and destroy. These people were created, and everyone has a story.

Sam Stout, UFC and today's youth

I met with Sam Stout today.  If you haven't heard of him then you must not be an avid fan of Ultimate Fighting Championship.  Sam is currently the TKO World Lightweight Mixed Martial Arts Champion with over 5 title defences, one of the top elites in the UFC (Lightweight Division) and a K1 Kickboxing Veteran.  Even with a 16-5-1 record, he made time to sit down an have a chat with me this afternoon.

Sam first became involved in mixed martial arts when his sister brought home her boyfriend to meet the family.  It wasn't that Sam wanted to take on the new boyfriend, but that the boyfriend was Shawn Tompkins.  Shawn was already involved in Martial Arts and Sam took a keen interest in the sport, helping Shawn at area competitions.  As time passed, Sam's sister married Shawn and Sam grew increasingly involved in MMA.

Shawn and I both attended East Elgin Secondary School in Aylmer, Ontario, but were no more than mere acquaintences.  Today, Shawn is the Lead Instructor of Team Tompkins (teamtompkins.ca) and the Head Trainer Tap Out Training Center (Las Vegas, Nevada).

Sam began his career in mixed martial arts in 2002.  He trains more in one week that many of us do all year.  Twice a day during the week up to 2 hours each time, and once on Saturday for up to 2 hours.  Doing the math, I figure 42 hours of weight, strength, agility and combat training each week.  I think I broke a sweat waching him train this afternoon - and I sure wouldn't want to be on the receiving end of his fist, or his feet.  He is a weapon.
 
Sam's perspective on life is akin to the Golden Rule - treat each other with respect and you will get respect. 
 
Sam speaks highly of MMA. It has taught him self discipline and physical endurance. He has traveled the world and seen many sights that most only dream of. What stood out as we talked was this comment about his experience in MMA: It teaches you to push yourself to the limit, then push past those limits. If only more people would apply this to daily living, maybe our world wouldn't be in the shape it is.
 
A loss in 2006 to Kenny Florian was Sam's toughest moment in his career.  He shared that he went into the match far too confident, and it cost him the win.  Sam speaks highly of the poeple who have helped him in his career, and his lifein general; his family and friends, training partners, Mark "The Machine" Hominick, Chris "The Polish Hammer" Horodecki and Shawn Tompkins.  He adds "Give credit to the people who deserve it."
 
Thanks Sam for taking the time to meet today.  I appreciate it.
 
 

 

 

 

Shout to the world!

When I was teenager, I hated the idea of having to read a book or write an essay.  I used to yawn when I walked into a book store; that's how much I was respulsed by the idea.  Times change people and people change the times.  I now enjoy reading.  I enjoy writing.  I enjoy writing about the interesting people that I meet on a daily basis since we all have a story to tell.

People like the Bubble Guy who makes his living traveling to community events across North America blowing bubbles.  People like the senior citizen who was a nurse at a concentration camp in Germany who married a Polish POW when they moved to Canada.  People like Snake who is judged because he is covered head to toe in tattoos.  Everyone has a story.

People who visit the drug houses in Novokuznetsk and offer hope.  People who travel, putting their own safety at risk to serve the needs of others.  People who think they have nothing to offer, but have a story that reveals how they have reached that point in their life.  Everyone has a story.

As we travel down this road together, I will speak of my opinions on what I see happening in the world - raising perfect children, hyper parents, youth culture, social awareness and the faultering social safety net.

I hope that you will enjoy "Everyone has a story" as much as I enjoy writing it.
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